In marrying Christian, her parents have been planing her marriage for quite sometime and i don't want to ruin it, am i allowed to have 2 different marriages, one for Islam, and one for Christianity?
Question
In marrying a Christian lady, since her parents have been planning her marriage for quite some time now and i don't want to ruin it for her, am i allowed to have 2 different ceremonies of marriage, one for Islam, and one for Christianity??? my next question is why are you not allowed to have any type of contact with your fiance?if you are not allowed to have contact with anyone from the opposite sex how are you even supposed to get to know the other person in order to even get engaged??? third question is, since as a Muslim we're are not allowed to have so much verbal contact with any females, how are we supposed to get to know them and find the right one for our selves???..because if this is not allowed, i think it would lead into arranged marriage where your parents pick your bride for you without your will. if these questions are open endidly answered i would appreciate it i have read alot of answers on this board, and i am looking for some new information rather than same answers that i've read before, since the other answers didn't really answer my questions..thank you very much.
Answer
1. Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) said "Whosoever adds to the (i.e. adds to their number by taking part) gathering of a certain people (joins them in sin if they are Muslims or takes part in their ceremony or cusstom if they are non-Muslim), he will be reckoned among them." This Hadith and numerous others like it directly forbid sharing in the practices/ ceremonies of non-Muslims. Therefore, it is not permissible to be present in a christian marriage ceremony, not even as an observer. See also (Marriage to Ahle-Kitaab women-attached)
2. Parents marrying of their children against their will is a practice of Jaahiliyyah (Period of ignorance) not sanctioned by Islam. There is a whole chapter of Ahadith instructing the Waliyy (Guardians) to seek permission from their charges before marrying them off. Similarly, there are many Ahadith describing the qualities one should seek in a spouse. This would not be possible if one did not have a choice in the matter. At the same time however, Islam has prohibited free intermingling of sexes due to the undeniable Fitnah (mischief) arising thereof. Therefore free contact between Ghair Mahaarim without necessity is forbidden. Marriage, however is a real necessity and has been recognised as such by Islam, in as much as a slight relaxation of the prohibition. A prospective spouse has been allowed to see without Hijaab, those parts of the body which are not Awrah for her/ his mahram relatives. Due to everpresent Fitnah, even now free contact is not allowed. This does not mean that a person is unable to find out about the character etc of the intended spouse. He /she will definitely have Mahram relatives of the same sex that they could communicate through, should the need arise. This system has worked well enough for fourteen centuries of Islam and continues to work more efficiently than the Kufr system of free contact. This is evident from the great disparaty in the divoce rate between e.g. America and Saudi Arabia. The high divorce rate in western countries speaks for itself. Despite intimate aquaintance before marriage, why, then is divorce rate still soaring?
and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best
Mufti Bilaal Cassim
FATWA DEPT.
CHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai
- Answered by
- Mufti Bilaal Cassim
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