What to look for in a boy or girl
Question
By taking into account hadiths and Quran, are there any criterias about the boy to see when the father receives the proposal for his daughter? (such as beauty, wealth etc for example). And what about the criterias in the reversed situation? ie to what should see the boy's parents concerning the girl?
Answer
The hadith has encouraged the aspect of Deen. Let Deen be the criteria. This does not mean that the girl should not be charming and attractive to him. However let Deen be deciding factor.
In the case of the boy, here again the hadith speaks of Deen and character. Let Deen and character be the reason for preference. However, the hadith also encourages us to marry people within our social standing so that the marriage may be manageable, there could be better understanding between the spouses and that none of the spouses may claim any type superiority over the other.
References (Arabic / Urdu sources)
عن أبي هريرة قال قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم إذا خطب إليكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فزوجوه إلا تفعلوا تكن فتنة في الأرض وفساد عريض (جامع الترمذي رقم 1084)
عن جابر أن النبي صلى الله عليه و سلم قال إن المرأة تنكح على دينها ومالها وجمالها فعليك بذات الدين تربت يداك (جامع الترمذي رقم 1086)
- Answered by
- Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)
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