Question & Answer Al-Jamiat Vol 9 (7/7)
Question
Respected Muslim brothers, I’d like to ask you a question. I am a Muslim from Kazakhstan and I’ve been praying Salaah for 2 years and I’ve been seeing a girl for the same period but I am unable to convince her to pray Salaah and don the Hijab. Whenever I try to encourage her, she says that she will become religiously inclined on her own someday. I love her very much, and Masha Allah I’m not the type of person to date a girl to get into bed with her. InshaAllah, I want to marry her. But I can’t explain it to her. Even when I just try to talk Arabic, she is uncomfortable with it.
It seems to me that she is extremely afraid of Islam and hence doesn’t want to come to it. After every Salaah, I ask Allah to guide her. I hope that one day; she’ll become a good mother and a wise wife Insha Allah. However, her dressing is inappropriate and I dislike they way she dresses. In the mean time, I’ve been studying Islam and Salaah and my views on life have changed Alhamdulillah. Please guide me on how to create the awareness for Deen in her heart! Thank you!
Answer
Masha Allah, it is pleasing to note your concern for Deen and Salaah. May Allah keep you steadfast and grant you the best of both worlds. Aameen.
At the outset, it is important to note that any form of communication with this female is Haraam (prohibited) in Islam. The Shari’ah has prohibited all types of relationships outside marriage regardless of what the intent may be. Having the intention to marry the girl does not justify the misdeed for such contact is considered to be adulterous in Shari’ah and will bring about negative consequences.
We understand from your query that you wish to marry this girl. Marriage is a sacred and Divine bond bestowed upon mankind by Allah. For this Divine bond to be successful we are in need of Divine Guidance and Allah has provided us with the appropriate divine guidance through the medium of Nabi Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam. Rasoolullah Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam said:
“A woman may be married for four reasons: for her wealth, her status, her beauty, and her religion; so try to be fortunate by marrying one who is religious…” (Sahih al-Bukhari, Hadith #: 5090, Narrated by Abu Hurairah)
This Hadith clearly advises us that when looking for a wife, her main feature of attraction should be her religiousness and obedience to Allah. If you really like this girl, then you should speak to your Mahram female relatives to encourage her towards practicing Deen. If she changes and begins to practice Deen, you may then marry her. However, if she desists, then we advise you – for your own good – to move on with your life and marry a girl who is pious and will assist you in the obedience of Allah.
Fatawa SA is an independent, read-only index of fatawa already published by Jamiatul Ulama KZN. It is not a fatwa service. For your own situation, ask the issuing Darul Ifta directly.